How I Gained Confidence with Boudoir Photos


You may hear the words “boudoir photos,” and think they aren’t something you could do. I think you should give them another thought, and here’s why.

Several years ago, after a traumatizing personal experience, I realized didn’t know who I was. As I tried to put myself back together, I realized I lacked confidence in myself. I really didn’t love myself and I was simply going through the motions. I needed to find a way to gain confidence. Fast forward several months, I earned work promotion and relocation. I had to leave my family for a month before they could join me in a new city. I was lonely and scared, but decided that I wasn’t going to let that take me off of the new path I had paved for myself. I still had a marathon to run on my self-love journey. And while I gained confidence on the professional front, I still had a way to go on the personal front.

That’s about the time I saw a Groupon for boudoir photos. Many moons ago, I had considered doing this as a gift for my husband. I even had the appointment booked with a photographer friend, but I chickened out. I allowed the lack of self-confidence get in the way of doing something so intimate. This time was different, though. I needed to do this for myself and no one else. I needed to push myself to step out of my comfort zone and love who I was at that very moment, rather than who I might be. And I need to apply my newfound professional confidence to myself. So I booked the appointment.

(Photo Credit: Ashley Marie Photography, Milwaukee, Wi) 

Let me tell you, it was scary, picking out and putting on that lingerie for someone other than me or husband to see, let alone photograph me in. But once I got over that, I felt empowered and beautiful, and during the shoot, you would have never known I was initially screaming inside. After it was over and I was fully clothed, I got to view my pictures to select.

I was blown away by what I had just accomplished. I didn’t recognize the person in these boudoir photos, who seemed to not have a care in the world and loved herself in that moment. And I had a sudden desire to be her, be ME inside and out.

Three years later, I’m happy to say I’ve lived up to that seemingly impossible goal.  I booked another shoot for myself, and my best friend who needed the same confidence boost that it gave me those years earlier. This time I walked in like I owned the place, told the photographer what I wanted, asked her NOT to edit out my stretch marks and fat rolls because I wanted to show who I was in that exact moment. All 315 pounds of me, imperfections and all.

I’m not saying that all of my self-confidence came from my first boudoir photo shoot, but I will stay it was instrumental in helping me build the confidence and self love that I needed to continue on my path to conquer the world.

I will tell everyone who reads this, GO DO IT. Put your insecurities aside, pick out some sexy lingerie, and book your photo shoot. Consider it an investment in YOU. And If there is an added bonus of giving a gift to a partner, yay. But this is something everyone woman should do for herself at least once. You won’t regret it! 

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Lori is a recent addition to the Milwaukee area where she lives in Brookfield with her hubby, kiddos and mom. She is learning to master the skills of all things mom related, and being a decent human by balancing the life of a sales manager road warrior by day and present wife and life coach to little humans by night (3rd and 5th grades are rough!). When she’s not juggling all of the above, you can find her at the Y swimming with the kiddos, finding new ways to torture (improve) her health or exploring the wonders of Milwaukee.


  1. Boudoir photo shoots are generally confidence boosting experiences, the first challenge is having the courage to turn up and relax for the shoot.


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