As I write this, I’m in tears. Sometimes I don’t know how I will keep it all together. How am I supposed to do it all? Often I don’t. I’m a working mom, a wife, and a mother of two kids. My kids are nine and ten years old, and I swear, there are times when they are far more challenging than when they were babies and toddlers.
I frequently get asked how I do it all. At work, I manage a team, participate in networking groups, and try to help in as many areas as I can. I love my job. At home, I juggle the kids; try to volunteer for their activities when I can. And I love my mom gig. Then there is everything else which, at this point, I don’t even know what falls into that category.
I don’t know how I do it all, I just do. It’s not some superhuman activity. I barely keep it all straight.
The reality is, I forget to email the teachers more often than I’d like to admit about something important. Occasionally, I forget to pay a bill. I forget activities on the home calendar and sometimes barely make it work. My house is frequently a mess; I have no energy or patience to play board games or catch with the kids when I get home. My husband is often frustrated with me because the laundry is piled as high as he is tall. Half the time, I can’t find my shoes. Dinner time is thrown together and often crispy because I’m doing 12 things while trying to make it. The list of my “Lack Ofs” is a mile long.
I’m trying to carve out time to do things for myself, like accomplish my forever goal of participating in a half marathon, going to the gym, reading books. Still, lately, those things only cause me guilt because I’m not able to also do the things I’ve convinced myself I should be doing for my family.
This summer, I vowed to take more time for these folks that call me Mom. I want to dedicate my weekends to them.
This weekend we did so much — a family mud run, Girl Scout Camp, a beach day, and so much more. But now it’s after 10:00 PM, and I leave for a three-day work trip tomorrow morning. I’m not packed, and I still have to submit my mileage and expense reports before I go to bed.
I can’t do it all.
Trying to find the balance between all the things I love, my husband, my kids, and my work is hard. Usually, I do a pretty okay job of it, but this entire month, I’ve felt like I’m not going to make it. Something will fall through the cracks. My kids will be mad, my husband will be cranky, and I’ll be hanging on by a thread. But, I’ll do it all with a smile on my face and somehow make it look easy so that someone remarks, “Man, you’re like a supermom!” I’m not.
Whether you are the working mom like me, or you’re on the outside looking in, know this: Us moms, all of us, working moms, stay at home moms, work at home moms, or the little-bit-of-everything moms, we’ve got mad skills where we just figure it all out. If you see us, ask how you can help. Or just help. Tell us we’re doing a good job, compliment our kids. Then offer us a glass of wine and a chance to put our feet up. But don’t call us supermom, because it adds pressure that we can’t live up to. The truth is, we work hard no matter what our title. And it’s just how we’re made. We might make it look easy, but it’s not. We’re just regular folks, trying to make it day by day without completely losing our minds.