There is NO such thing as being a part-time mom.
It’s full-time. With overtime. Nights and weekends.
But I wrote this one for the mamas out there — including myself — that work part-time in a job other than mothering. Half the week we are at home with our kiddo(s) doing ALL THE THINGS and the other half of the week we are working in an office, commuting, caffeinating, networking, filing, typing, scheduling, meeting….just to name a few.
So can I be honest for one hot sec?
Somedays it feels like I live in two completely separate full-time worlds.
My mom world, which takes all of me, and my work world, which also takes all of me. Not to mention being a wife, a friend, a sister, a daughter, and throwing in some me time (is there even any me left for this?!) It’s just a lot. Most days I find that I am running out the door to a meeting-filled work day that ends with me running home to my son, dinner prep, bath time, and snuggles. Running. Always running running running.
It’s busy. It takes me a while to just orient myself to the day when it starts. I’m checking iCal for the run-down and I rely on my mom-friends to unintentionally alert me to the day’s activities (Friend: “Do you guys mind if Frank shows up with a runny nose? I need to get out of the house.” Me: Oh yeah! We have playgroup today!) It’s not for everyone, but I’m choosing it.
In my attempt to be both a mother and an employee, I am hustling.
I look forward to the days when I can stay in my pajamas until after nap time or take leisurely walks with my son early in the morning without looking at the clock. I enjoy snacking on animal crackers and cheddar bunnies, playing games with my son, scheduling playdates and outings for the days we are together. But most of all, I love just being with him. He seems to be growing up so fast now that he finally sleeps through the night and working part-time makes me realize our time on the days that I am home is so precious.
There are certainly days when I wonder if I am missing out on too much of his childhood by working half of it.
But on the flip side, I genuinely look forward to work days: waking up and having to be somewhere, putting on business casual, talking with adults throughout the day, bringing in additional income, keeping a career alive, fanning the flames on the passions that I developed as an undergrad and using the skills I gained in grad school. Keeping my pre-baby self alive. The self I longed for just a few months after my son was born.
As much as I love parenting, I also I need an outlet, a challenge, and an identity in the working world. For a little while after becoming a mom, I felt guilty that I still wanted to have a career too. I haven’t worked through all of that yet, but I know that working in a career that I love doesn’t make me a bad or negligent mother. It makes me a mama who wants to boldly display to my child that I am invested in my community, dreaming big, and serving others. I hope my son sees and admires those qualities in me.
Part-time momming is a lot of juggling, so props to all the ladies out there for keeping it together on the daily. And double props to all my comrades out there who also wear a top knot to the office. You rock. You’re doing a lot of things in a little amount of time and hair just ain’t one of them.