Raising a type-A child when you’re type-B

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Motherhood doesn’t come with a manual. I’ve learned that much already. As much as I wish it did, I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t follow it. I’m not a type-A, listen to the rules, and follow things kind of girl. My house is a perpetual mess. I like having people over because it makes me clean it. I have one calendar that I attempt to fill out monthly, but if the appointment wasn’t made before I sit down to fill it, chances are it doesn’t get put on it. I have friends who text me the important things, such as the orchestra concert times and day, along with what Naudia should wear. I have a company and store my inventory in random places, yet it’s organized to me. I keep most of the appointments in my head and use the Facebook reminder app for many things, so I remember at least 12 hours before it’s supposed to happen. I’m a procrastinator and ultimately a type-B personality.

My daughter, God Bless her soul, is a type-A personality when it comes to life. She wakes up and asks me for the daily rundown (I usually don’t have anything, including breakfast, planned) and stresses herself out constantly if she isn’t on track. She reminds me of things and lets me know daily what today’s date is. Her room looks like a typical 7-year-old’s room, and her socks never match, but that girl will tell you about upcoming events and appointments I still need to make. She’s like my secretary.

She’s also a type-A in her schoolwork. Everything needs to be done perfectly, and if she doesn’t get it the first time around, she cries. Recently, I was talking to her about her math skills, and she was trying to count money. Truth be told, I hate math. I say it often, and I think it finally wore off on her. I feel awful. She couldn’t count some change, and I was at a loss. After all, she learned this in school last year and knew it! What happened?

I’m a teacher by trade, but I teach English.

However, learning is learning. The logical part of me knew that deep down, she knows this, and everything would be okay. The teacher in me knew the right things to say. However, the type-B mother in me started to freak out a little. What if she never learns to add? How is she going to live her life thinking nickels are quarters and quarters are dimes? Good Lord, I’m going to raise a girl who can’t count cash, will end up with a load of debt, and then end up back at my house. What have I done? Of course, she feels my angst, and it only doubled her emotional state. Long story short, we both cried and ended up reading a book together.

The next day, we talked to her teacher, who assured her (and me) that everything was fine. My poor type-A daughter asked for a tutor during recess so that she wouldn’t be lost. I was ready to sit on said tutoring sessions so I could learn how to teach her. However, after some words of encouragement, she and I are on the path back to success.

I’ve come up with some math ideas and things to do at home. While I’ll probably never use a measuring cup for baking and can’t really apply math to daily household things like folding socks (because I barely fold them), I will do my best to sit down with her and concentrate on math. I’ve realized she learns best kinesthetically, and I work best when I sit down and leave the hecticness that is my house and just focus on her. We both need this equally.

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