Today, I Did Nothing

Today, I did nothing.

I try to plan events for my son and me to do every day. I use the term event loosely as an “event” could be going to the grocery store or wandering around Goodwill. It gives us a reason to get dressed and gets us out of the house.

I saw today approaching on the calendar and could not find an event to place in the empty space under the date. I was initially panicked.

I like to plan, have structure and wear my kid out. But my friends had plans, I had gone to the grocery store the day before, and the weather wasn’t good for the park. I just didn’t have the energy to pack up and get in the car without a purpose.

Today was going to drag on.

We woke up and lazily ate breakfast in our pajamas. After breakfast, we read books and examined our socks. We made a fort out of a tiny table and a blanket. I watched my son pick up dirt and crumbs off my kitchen floor. He handed them to me one at a time.

I only checked the clock when my son started to show the signs he was getting sleepy. Somehow, it was already time for his morning nap! 

After his nap, we shared a cheese stick. We played with cat toys. I asked him to do things like find my nose, bounce his ball, stack blocks, and climb up and down the stairs. It amazed me to see how much he understood what I was saying. I paid attention to the small things because I could. I didn’t have anywhere to be or anything I had to do. I wasn’t distracted. I was present and enjoying my son in a way I haven’t in a long time.

Maybe always having something to do was preventing us from actually doing something together.

I’m always so focused on what’s next, where we need to be, what we accomplished during the day. I worry about whether my son learned or experienced something new during the day. I feel so much pressure to be a good teacher, mother, and playmate. I don’t want to waste a day of his life for fear it will set him back in his development.

What I realized from my day of doing nothing is I worry too much, I plan too much, and I need to relax because it’s going to benefit not only me, but also my son. We need days to connect at our own pace, in an organic way.

I look forward to our next do nothing day. I will now cherish them as they are precious and will become less and less possible as my son grows up.

Today was a great day.