
"There is nothing biological or chemical about my wife that would cause her to know how many jars of pickles are currently in pantry."
Episode 15 – A Dad’s Perspective on the Mental Load of Motherhood
Disclaimer: This episode’s featured guest is a dude. A dad. A guy married to a woman, with kids. As he will mention many times (because it’s worth mentioning), he can only speak to his perspective from that experience but acknowledges that obviously many families look differently than his and that’s just fine and dandy. Moving right along….
What is the “Mental Load?” Dave Nelsen calls it “the term for the intangible burden placed upon moms” to know and do all the things. It can mean managing the calendar to knowing the right kind of pickles to buy for which kids. It can be juggling a full time career and all the laundry. Or maybe it’s scheduling all the pediatrician visits, doing the meal planning, or making sure all the birthday cards are sent out on time. The mental load is massive and it looks different in each family.
In this episode, we talk to Dave Nelsen, a stay at home dad who has a thing or two to say about how he sees the parenting community around him perpetuating the mental load of motherhood and what he thinks can be done to begin to lessen that load. He also has some pretty spicy takes on issues like sexist product slogans and beloved 2000s sitcoms.
Buckle up, friends. We are diving in head first to some big issues on this episode that include working parenthood, gender stereotypes, toxic masculinity, and even get an answer about “The 20 Minute Dad Poop.”
Episode #15 - Show Notes
FEATURED BLOG CONTENT:
- This Stay-at-Home Dad is Staying Home – Again by Dave
- Come on Dads, It’s Time to Do More by Dave
- Kids Seeing Dads do Chores Could Change the World by Dave
FEATURED RESOURCES:
- Working Moms of Milwaukee Website
- “Getting Dads Doing More Around the House, Starting with a History Lesson” from CNN Health
- The Mental Load by Emma
- Delusions of Gender by Cordelia Fine*
- The Second Shift by Arlie Hochschild*
*affiliate links
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
- ComedySportz
- Dead alligator found on North Side of Milwaukee
- The Milwaukee Lion
- Grammar Geek
- 1983 movie “Mr. Mom”
- Mr. Mom Show on Walmart’s Streaming Service
- The Big Backyard
- Kids in Motion
- “The Mask You Live In” documentary
- Meghan Markle and the Ivory Soap Commercial
- Sexist Huggies ad campaign
- Friends
- Woodman’s Market
- Ampersand Theater Co.
- The Laughing Tap
- IMPROV at The Corners of Brookfield
Episode #15 - About Our Guest

DAVE NELSEN
Dave Nelsen is the first Dad writer on the Milwaukee Mom writing team! He is a married father of two and a proud stay-at-home father. He runs a freelance copyediting business, Grammar Geek, and has been a performer at ComedySports for the better part of two decades. He can talk about the Brewers with you from here to Tuesday, but is much more confident talking potty accidents and sleep training than college football.