As I write this, I have now been sick for well over a week. There is the never-ending headache, which pairs nicely with the nauseous feeling and general tummy upset. My head seems foggy, so I apologize in advance if it doesn’t make total sense. The only thing I want to do is lay in bed. Here’s the problem:
Mom sick days don’t exist.
Of course, my husband steps up and feeds the children and gets them to bed, but they still need me to come and kiss them goodnight. Only mom will do as company at the bus stop, and when there’s an invisible cut on a finger, it has to be mom to put a bandaid on and give a kiss to make it feel better.
It definitely makes me feel good to be wanted and needed, but sometimes I also need to sleep and take care of myself.
As my children get older, it is easier for them to help themselves, but I do know I have set myself up for failure in some aspects of my parenting. I’m the one that makes the lunches every day, picks out their clothes for school, and makes sure their backpacks are packed. I could bet my life that my husband does not know when library day is for any of the boys.
I also make sure there are clean clothes to wear, food in the fridge, and clean cups to drink from.
Most days this is fine, and I actually like doing these things for them. If I’m honest, I like being in control of these things. In fact, I often reload the dishwasher, if my husband has done it. I go back to the store for the right brand of cashew milk, and I can’t stand it when he interrupts my laundry flow.
So, partially, I’ve taken mom sick days off the table. I know I need to work on sharing responsibility for some of these things and keep teaching the boys independence, but it’s a work in progress.
I do think these things are part of my job as a stay-at-home mom, and they are hard to give up, even when I’m not feeling good.
However, when you think of it as a job, it’s pretty unfair that mom sick days aren’t part of the deal. I would gladly give up my non-existent paycheck for a day of complete silence and rest some days. I would love for someone to take care of me. Someone to fetch me an extra blanket, get me my favorite comfort foods, and make sure I’m comfortable.
Then, I realize that I want that person to be my mom.
I guess no matter how old you are, or what stage you are in your life, a mom’s love is sometimes the only thing that makes us feel better.
So, even though it may be hard at the time, I will push through the days I don’t feel good when my kids truly need me. There really is a good reason that mom sick days don’t exist.